Our arrogance allows us to believe that our logical self is in charge of our lives. Well, only if the rest of us is going that way. Jonathan Haidt, in his book Happiness, redefines the ancient story of our minds being like a man on top of an elephant; he can decide where to go if that suits the elephant. Elephant = emotions and/or the unconscious mind.
I believe this is why CBT (cognitive behaviour therapy) only works when the emotions have been worked through. Often clients believe they are ‘sorted’ and then find themselves ambushed by feelings at some point in the future.
Working through difficult emotions does not have to be like sitting astride, or being flattened by a stampeding elephant however. It can be a gentle process, taken at a steady safe pace; painful perhaps at times but not unbearable.
This is a behavioral psychology mental model that was originally presented by psychologist Jonathan Haidt (http://en.wikipedia.org/
- An emotional/automatic/irrat
ional side (the elephant) - An analytical/controlled/rat
ional side (its rider).